In Business, Honesty Is Not Always the Best Policy


I recall a conversation I had with a co-worker of mine many years back. Not one of them determined to work with me, although I told him that I was frustrated because I was aware that I could help several of the folks I ‘d lately spoken to.

We discussed handling objections in a sales dialogue. Among the things he shared with me was that I needed to tell the facts, to call people outside if required and not hide behind being fine.

It was guidance that is extremely great and it made a remarkable shift in the potency of my sales dialogues.

Just after discussing with my co-worker I got an e-mail from someone who’d determined not to work with me. The reason she gave me was cash. With my new tool of complete truthfulness, I reacted back.

My answer was based on the dialogue we’d, although I do not recall precisely what I said. It was what I really believed was going on. I wrote something along the lines of “I consider the reason you’re saying no has nothing related to the cash but instead because you’re scared.”

What I do recall is the way fast she responded to that e-mail. Within seconds I understood just how she felt about my answer. She said that I was correct. She was not scared, although her choice had nothing related to cash. It absolutely was none of my business why she was saying using cash as an explanation, was not more difficult than going into it. She said I ‘d no right to promptly remove her name from any future communications and to judge her. She never needed to hear from me.



I was perplexed because I understood actually, I ‘d only intended to reengage her in a dialogue and what I ‘d said was accurate.

I was reminded of it recently when someone in a group I trainer shared what occurred to her, although it is been some time since I thought about this storyline. She left a voicemail for someone she was attempting to touch base with. In the voicemail she told him the truth and called him outside she saw. That got his attention. She got a message back telling her that he did not value the comments and that her message totally transferred the opinion he’d of her… and not for the better.

Inside my job as a trainer I am designed to share what I see. It is my job to be honest. It is why people hire me. I help them get past their particular challenges. I help them to see the things they overlook. Because they’re too close matters they can not see. Occasionally what they may be missing is advice that is straightforward, but more generally what they’re missing is inside of them.

That is not to imply that I can be mean, when my clients hire me they expect me to be totally fair. I share truths that help my customers in ways that helps them grow and supports them.

I understand it’s, and if that is valid, what did I do wrong in the e-mail I sent? Had it generated so a brutal reaction?

I made two huge mistakes.

I didn’t request permission to talk about my truth. This girl wasn’t my client. Whether what I said was correct, or not, I ‘d to say it, it wasn’t my area. And, while it wasn’t my intent, in effect, she was being bullied by me. Of course she defended herself in her reply to me. I gave her no other option. She needed to prove me wrong. It absolutely was her right to choose whether or not she needed to hear it before it was shared by me.

I conveyed by e-mail. I was replying to her e-mail. I needed to reengage her in a dialogue. An e-mail isn’t a dialogue. An e-mail is a one way exchange. A voicemail message is a one way exchange, also. However carefully I picked my words, there isn’t any way she could have comprehended what I actually meant. No wonder she got upset with me.